Manorama - Six Feet Under

And it stole the thunder!

Three year after Charas, I saw a movie which I can call a thriller. However, by the dint of previous experience, I was quite sure I need to see it in the opening week only, otherwise it would be a goner. And today, there is not a single show in Pune!

Desperate needs require desperate measures, and I just managed it by a whisker. Yesterday, I probably saw its last show of the country - 11 PM. I had made up my mind the day before, and as soon as I was back from office, I went to pick the ticket one hour early - though needlessly so. They were available in abundance.

The guy at the ticket counter watched me in disbelief as if saying who-is-this-idiot-watching-this-movie-at-this-hour ! Never mind!

When we reached the multiplex, there was absolutely nobody at Screen 3. Old memories of Ghatak started flooding in. Ten years back, at the Devki theater in Kanpur(which incidentally is the biggest film screen I have ever seen), I had watched that movie along with just three friends and a stray dog!

However by the time this movie started about 30-40 people had poured in.

As always, I am not writing the story here, but I must tell you, how much ever you go prepared, it is almost impossible for you to unknot each and every thread. Mystery just refuses to die, and twists out-twist themselves. I kept feeding people with my whodunit bright sparks, bungling quite often, until I shut up!

I remember a similar scenario from a Sydney Sheldon novel - The Windmills of God. Well, there is ruthless assassin in the book with pseudonym - Ariel, and of all the people I know, by far whoever has read that novel, he or she has not been able to guess the real identity of that assassin, even after open challenges before hand.

Coming back to the movie. The plot is as intriguing as it can get, and kind of reminds me of few James Hadley Chase novels I have read. Characters have a laid back earthly charm which reminds you of the people you know. Dialogues are the work of brilliance, and not one without a punch.

Then there is Rajasthan. Not the one which is shown to attract tourists with Chokhi Dhanis and Folk dances. The real mofussil Rajasthan where life refuses to move. Where people do not move in Opal Astra but brand new Honda CD 100 or battered Lambretta. And yes, not to forget those copious moustaches where could one graze a cow on.

Actors, barring Kulbhushan Kharbanda, have given top notch performance. Abhay Deol is sincere as a failed novelist, who wants to prove something. Gul Panag fairs well as a blow hot blow cold middle class homemaker. Raima Sen tries to be a seductress, but tastes only half the success.

Along with Deol, it is his Sala in the movie - Vinay Pathak as the Sub Inspector Brij Mohan who gives the comic relief in the movie - has impressed the most. He has got the best lines, and the dialogue delivery - one of the best one would have ever seen.

Kharbandha is as limited as he was as Shakaal 27 years ago. Neither that accent has gone, nor the expression.

So if you are lucky enough to have this movie still running in any of the theaters in your city, just gobble it. We need to make such movies a success. 1000 times more successful than Hey Baby.

Deewar

(Warning: This post may hurt the religious sentiment of many people. I apologise in advance)

For the lovers of movie Deewar, there was a double treat this Sunday.

SAB TV was showing the original Deewar, while Sahara Filmy was showing the dubbed version of its Tamil remake - Thee - almost simultaneously. I wouldn't have cast a second glance at the dubbed one when suddenly I noticed - Darwaja Mai Kholoonga scene. It was then that I realised it is Deewar remake. Curiously, I hung on.

Incidentally, Amitabh's character - Vijay was played by none other than Rajinikant.

It was literally a frame by frame copy of the original. The production values were poor comparitively. While former was typically a serious film, latter was comic relief primarily because director had let Rajnikant make complete hash of the character with his antiques. He would still light his match sticks with chair handle. But then it is his style.

Interestingly, Shashi Kapoor's character Ravi is played by Suman, the actor who has played villain in Sivaji - The Boss. Rajini has also worked in other remakes of Amitabh's hits - (Billa - Don, Ram Robert Rahim - Amar Akbar Antony, Panakkaran - Laawaris, Padikkathavan - Khuddar, Velaikkaran - Namak Halal, Dharmathin Thalivan - Kasme Vaade, Mr. Bharath - Trishul).

One of my Tamil friends from Chennai told me an interesting story. When I asked him the reason behind Baba Rajini's lunatic fan following, he told me it was because Rajini's has 7th sense. I asked what was that ?

The answer - Nonsense.

Chak De India

Well, till now almost every one in the blog world has either written or read a review on Chak De. So be it. Since I have seen and liked the movie, so I will do it too.

I am no Shahrukh fan, but despite myself I went ahead to see this movie because like to Vandy, to me also it had raised hopes of Prakash Jha's Hip Hip Hurray. My only concerns were the ones which a typical Yashraj- Shahrukh combo present.

While the former was notably a realistic movie, latter was threatening to be larger than life, but as a pleasant surprise, Sharukh is excellent in this movie - even better than Swadesh - the movie is almost without a blemish, and no, this is one is not a piece of art. Its a complete masala movie till the last scene.

As a writer, not a doubt remains that Jaideep Sahini has the nerve of his characters. He knows the nuances of the lives of common Indian, first Khosla Ka Ghosla, and now Chak De has shown that. The eclectic troupe of actors (& non actors) were given the as much significance as they deserved.

The build up was realistic too. In the do or die match against men's hockey team, there were no adrenaline or heroics. The result was realistic too, and very well conceived( I won't reveal that). To show the revenge, there was no compulsory match against Pakistani women's team just because no such team exists! Sanely, India didn't create any extravagant fireworks in the follow-up matches after losing to Australia in World Cup.

The point I am trying to make is though you knew the final outcome, writer kept you from guessing the outcome of the sub plots. In fact, he consistently surprises you with the unexpected.

The best part I liked about the movie was the fact the way they repatedly dealt with State regionalism, the seniority and internal bickering. It was like a harsh-slap-in-face kind of dialogues delivered with clenched teeth and pursed lips. It was clear that writer-director duo were firm in their message, if at all there was a message.

All these examples are from live events. We very well know about the egos of our seniors like Dhanraj Pillai. How we are aware about the shameful spats between Dhanraj Pillay and Gagan Ajit Singh, where latter refused to give passes to former in the Olympics matches. Mohammad Shahid, who was such a gifted hockey player, rarely used to give a pass which eventually destroyed his career. How the players from Punjab had made a cartel against others.

At some locations, writer did took cinematic liberties like - creating a character - Abhimanyu Singh - which is not unlike Yuvraj Singh. The guy is young, dashing, on whom girls croon( including the hockey team girls) and shares the same surname. He has been recently appointed the vice captain of the one day Cricket team, again like Yuvraj who was made vice-captain though was dropped later.

One of the hockey officials who flanked Anjan Srivastava - the hockey chief who was babudome personified - bore an uncanny resemblance to Jafar Iqbal, the former hockey captain and coach. All director needed was to put a Sikh at the helm of the affairs and KPS Gill's team would have been complete.

The chauvinism of the cricket towards hockey was, though rightfully added, but to prove more than a point, especially the stuff mouthed by the character Abhimanyu Singh towards hockey. No genuine sportsman can give such remarks for another sport, much less for our national game.

Then something about breaking one-to-one marking of the Korean team. It was made like that it was some Chakravyuh like situation which could be solved only by one individual. It sounded intriguing but silly. More that one to one marking, Koreans forte is long passes. They outwit their opponents with this. But these are minor gripes, and to dwell more on these will be knit picking.

However I will reiterate that what towered above everything else was the breezy performance by Shahrukh Khan. It was like breath of fresh air. I think he should pick up a fight with Yash Chopra, and say sorry to Karan Johar so that he may not have to do their movies in future.

Last but not least I must thank Aryan that he had let us see this movie without moving our limbs, and did not wake up till we were well inside the parking.

The Blue Umbrella

None of my grannies ever told me a story. However, a few Mausis & elder cousin sisters, here and there, did oblige. I used to hear them again and again with same interest and liking. Therefore all those Anaar-Ranis, Sukkhu-Dukkhus are firmly etched in my memory.

That's the secret about the good stories. You can hear or read them again and again, and still won't get bored of them. I have lost count how many times I must have read my favourite books, despite knowing the contents all too well. Every repeat read, in fact, adds another perspective.

Rarely I have seen a children story adopted on celluloid. Vikram Vetal in the mid eighties was one in which Satish Shah played Vetal. Keeping with the trend of that era, it was an utterly hopeless movie.

However, I was eagerly waiting for this one. For once, it was good old Ruskin Bond and then it was directed by Vishal Bharadwaj. However, at the end of the move, I realized some stories are better told or read, rather than seen.

The biggest flaw of this movie is that its not a children movie at all. It can't be when it fails to brings more than a laughter or two in the crowd full of kids. It is hardly entertaining. Rather, it turns out to be quite a heavy movie.

See, we all know of what Pankaj Kapoor is capable of. There was no point in hammering that point again & again. Instead of being a soft rib tickler which Ruskin Bond stories usually are, it dwells too much on human emotions. It looks more a piece of art than a children piece.

The dialogues weren't funny on their face value. It was the pahari accent which was used as the laughter tool. Initially it worked, but soon it became repetitive.

In fact, more than these it were the ridiculous subtitles which appeared more funny. I think subtitles is big business opportunity. They remain as idiotic as they were two decades back.

Some of the side stories were without context. They were supposed to be funny, but fell hopelessly short of that. In fact, the pace of the movie was so slow that it was hard to ward off sleep.

To liven the pace, Vishal did try to use the beautiful colours and sounds of the Himachal. There was a Mela here, and song there. But I have serious objection to the way these scenes were edited. It looked so jarring to the eyes.

The only two good thing in the whole movie were - Pankaj Kapoor, the and the blue Japanese umbrella(before it became red). Kapoor worked on his diction well. The way he said "Rajaraam" and "By Chance" made it appear that he has spent his whole life in the hills of rural Himachal.

However, at a few places Vishal did show his attention to detail - especially at the point when Nand Kishore Khatri aka Pankaj Kapoor sees the Chhatri for the first using confiscated binoculars. Besotted Kapoor acts in a particular way when he re-adjusts the binoculars. It can be appreciated only when seen.

But that does not mean I am suggesting you to see the movie.

Apney

The probablity of myself watching this movie in my entire lifetime will be not more than the probablity of spotting Dalai Lama in China, but I can say one thing for sure without even seeing the movie.

This oughtta be the costliest home video ever made.

the-owls

I am trying to rhyme Deols as the-owls. Deols as in Dharmendra, Sunny and Bobby.

I think their genetic code have been altered for the worse in such a manner that they keep living in their own collectively delirium, and refuse to come out of it. I have seen many such evidences. Here is one such with elder brother. The other one with younger brother follows.

Karan Johar, in Koffe With Karan, asks Bobby Deol whether Sholay should be remade. Latter answers "No it can't, because you cannot remake a remake. Sholay was a remake of my dad's - Mera Gaon Mera Desh!"

I was stunned. Ramesh Sippy could have choked. Karan gasped in breathlessness, but to his credit, he could continue without showing.

This, however, begets the question that by what stretch of imagination, and scale of comparison can be Sholay be termed as a remake of Mera Gaon Mera Desh ? I conclude it is the same delirium which I have talked about.

The fatherly and brotherly love between them has outwitted their senses irrevocably. All this was fine as long as they kept this within the family dining table, but the problem is that it is now spilling out.

I fear for the next generation, when their kids will talk fondly about "legendry" movies like Gadar and Barsat.

Cheeni Kum

R. Balki, why do you guys make the cardinal sin of making such a boring promos for otherwise such a fantastic movie! And despite being an Ad man yourself.

I almost didn't watch it.

Had it not been for the irrestible desire to watch a movie in a cinema hall(after not being able to watch one for more than 10 months now - courtesy Aryan), and that company was offering free movie ticket 'n food for its employees and their spouses, and that only alternative was - The Pirates Of Carribean(which was as good as no option) - I almost didn't watch it.

Thank God I did. Thoroughly enjoyble, except last 20 minutes.

With minimal but solid characters and incredible dialogues(almost each of them), I haven't seen any movie in recent past having such quality, except Khosla Ka Ghosla, of course.

Since movie hardly has a story, and is primarily based on conversations between the characters(cellphone was no less a small character in itself), the dialogues had to be sharp and witty. Balki has written them very very well. They will remain with the audience for a long long time.

Characters have terrific chemistry in between them - Amitabh-Tabu, Amitabh-Zohra Sehgal(mom), and Amitabh-Sexy(Swini Khara - the little neighbour). And that was because of these excellent actors, and superbly crafted lines. I especially loved the refreshing capsules between Amitabh and Sexy.

At first it appeared that grown up dialogues might sound too heavy on the girl - Swini, but her deadpan delivery pulled it off every single time.

Zohra is a darling. She is an immensely talented women, and has remarkable screen presence.

This movie has no bollywood cliches. Every event is handled naturally. So you won't realise when did the romance develop. Tiffs between the couples are natural. The only melodrama of the movie has been provided by Paresh Rawal which somewhat spoils the movie.

But in totality, it is an excellent movie which will yet again flop because there is no Yash or Johar marketing here.

And yes, Amitabh Bachchan has re-affirmed that he is still the king.

A must watch.

Umrao Jaan

I know Lucknowites are fuming. They are furious about what ifs and what nots; about the hara-kiris. They are angry at JP Dutta. More than angry, they are hurt. And now this hurt has changed into ridicule, not only in Lucknow but in the whole country.

Feel sorry for the situation Dutta is in, but he probabily asked for it.

Personally speaking, I knew he would be in even more dreadful situation than Farhan Akhtar was. The latter at least had the support of the original script writer, former has no such privilege. He even claims it is not a remake.

While Lucknowites may have gone overboard with their displeasure, JP Dutta nevertheless made too many mistakes, even if we forget the mistake of making an attempt to make this movie. I would have not dared to remake a movie which had won Best Director, Best Actress, Best Music Director and Best Singer at National Awards.

Casting
The say well begun is half done, and Dutta begun very badly by choosing an awful star cast, more so if you compare with the earlier one.

Umrao Jan was not an extraordinarily beautiful woman; she was attractive, intelligent, brave and a good poetess. From the age of twelve, she had found herself in unfortunate situations. One needed an actress, who acts and expresses well, not a wooden star who is a former Miss World. For Dhoom-2 its fine, but not here.

My choice would have been Konkona Sen Sharma.

And look at the other casts - Suniel Shetty, as Faiz Ali(Raj Babbar), a Daku who helps Umrao to escape Kotha, at least for sometime, or Puru Rajkumar as Gauhar Mirza(Naseeruddin Shah) as a scheming pimp. Is it not preposterous!

Music
The character is a melancholy, doomed courtesan, who loves and is jilted; who performs Mujra in Mehfils. She lets out her pain in form of Gazhals. This needed a haunting album, a masterpiece which would have mixed well with the script and the settings.

Javed Akhtar failed miserably here, so did flat Alka Yagnik. As far as Anu Malik is concerned, JP Dutta should have taken horses for courses, his previously successful association notwithstanding. The zing is completely missing.

The magic of Khayyam, Shaharyar, and Asha Bhosle is sorely missed. What an album it was! You can feel Umrao's love and pain in Asha's voice, and in Shaharyar's poetry. The earlier choice was Jaidev, but his tunes were rejected by Muzaffar Ali.

Script
The dialogue writer of Muzaffar Ali's Umrao Jaan, apart from Muzaffar himself, were brilliant Javed Siddiqui and Shama Zaidi.

If they sound unknown entities, let me tell you that former wrote the dialogues of Shatranj Ke Khiladi(co-wrote), Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge, Darr, Baazigar, Koi Mil Gaya, Raja Hindustani, Pardes, among others and latter has written for Garam Hawa, Shatranj Ke Khiladi(co-wrote), Netaji Subhas Chandra Bose to name a few. The fact that they have local connection helped a lot.

So much pain was taken in Talaffuz - the diction - that it was difficult to find a fault. To see Rekha - a Tamizh - speak fluent Lucknawi accent was a treat to ears. Not only she, Asha Bhosle - a Maharashtrian, and Talat Aziz - a Telgu followed the book, and Talat still vouches on the perfectionism of Khayyam and Muzaffar Ali, when he was made to speak Phoolon in refined Lucknawi Urdu way, different from accented Hyderabadi Urdu way.

Have been hearing that Ashwariya is not able to speak even 'Khuda' properly. Dutta has been giving excuses of Ashwariya being Manglorean, but Rekha belongs to further south, and what was the director himself doing during the dubbing?

The character of Dilawar Khan, who kidnaps Ameeran and sells her off as Umrao Jaan, has been shown speaking Haryanvi! Haryanvi in Faizabad? Vow! And to comment on the diction of Suniel Shetty, Puru Rajkumar, and sometimes even Abhishek Bachhan would be redundant.

Settings
Not shooting Umrao Jan in Lucknow is like not shooting Gandhi in India. This clearly showed JP Dutta lacked the passion of Muzaffar Ali. JP Dutta earlier said that Lucknow monuments are in bad shape, and that prompted him to move to his favourite Rajasthan, and now he retracts that 80% is shot in Lucknow, and 20% percent in Jaipur.

I doubt it. Not a single promo shows Lucknow, except the painting of Imam Bara. The architecture is clearly Rajputana, not Awadhi. Not even the dressing. Even the media is talking about Safas, Pathan suits, beards so unlike Lucknow of that era.

In Ali's movie, all the artifacts, locations, costumes, musical instruments like Sarangi, even stuff like carpets, flower vase, lamps, Hookah, silver Paan boxes, crystal lamps, mirrors were authentic.

Some of these were brought Muzaffar Ali's ancestral Haveli at Kotwara, and other were gathered from local Nawabi households in Mehboobabad, Malihabad, and Kakori. Dress designing was done by Suhasini Ali, the then wife of Muzaffar Ali, keeping in mind of the dressing of that time after thorough research.

Shooting of interiors were done in the Kaiserbagh Baradari, and other Kothis, not at erected the sets. Some monuments look neglected but less because of poor upkeep and more because they were destroyed by British after Lucknow battle in 1857.

But still, it JP Dutta's baby and his interpretation. We can criticize, or lament but God only knows what his reasons were. It is not the first time authenticity is being compromised and not the last time either.

Khosla Ka Ghosla

I know I am too late on the subject, but better late than never. This is the only movie I have seen in last three months, since Omkara, and that too on a pirated DVD.

I doubt whether it is still running in any of the cinema halls near by you, but those who haven't watched it yet, you must have a dekho on DVD, at least. It is as refreshing as was the last year release Mai Meri Patni Aur Woh.

I am not telling the story, but somewhere down the line, it quite reminded me of Not A Penny More, Not A Penny Less the first novel attempt by Jeffery Archer, but later I changed my mind because though the revenge was not a penny less, it was quite a many pennies more.

Actually speaking, the whole story is quite simplistic, but its the scenes, characters and dialogues which make the movie refreshing and believable.

Khosla(Anupam Kher), as an honest, simple and gullible person to the fault makes you pull your hairs out in frustration. For once, you wonder whether a person like this can exist, but look around and you would find many. Agreed, as a government servant, it is impossible for a person to lead his full life in honesty, and remain successful to cling on to his values till retirement, but yet, you would find them many.

And Kher pulls off as Khosla like a dream. Khosla who is irritatingly idealistic; who is a father who wishes good for his children, but in his own way, without listening to their view point; who thinks that this world is an ideal place to live, until he meets Khurana.

Khurana(Boman Irani) is a wily land grabber. He grabs lands with fake papers, deep contacts and money & goonda power. He is the type of person who guzzles the likes of Khosla without even a burp. And Irani plays the part as if he has been a land grabber all his life.

Credit goes to script writer Jaideep Sahini to able imagine and write such characters.

Just look at Khurana's body language - flashy clothing, lavish jewelry, deliberately protruding belly, measured gait - everything is so imposing about him, and yet he is not a Mogambo type, strike-terror-in-your-face type villain, rather he is wily, smooth talker, with a ready smirk, and he is a Bhakt of Mata Rani like an every devout Punjabi. He never verbally threatens, but gives enough hints which are enough to run chill down the spine of his victims.

The meeting between Khosla and Khurana is one of the finest scenes of the movie. Every dialogue is well chosen, I especially liked the fact that Khurana calls Khosla as "Uncle Ji", despite being of roughly same age. The message is simple - "You are an aging, bungling, middle class, loser and I am the boss."

Also, the way he dismisses the shocked, dumbfounded Bunty(Ranveer Shourie), the eldest son of Khosla, who was accompanying him to the meeting, it was an intelligent trick. Khurana immediately realizes that he can be a nuisance during the negotiation, and that his father would be an easier prey to feast.

Coming to Ranveer Shourie, I must say he has the best character and best dialogues in the movie, and surprisingly he is the most effortless performer.

As the jobless, idiotic youth, who derives scant respect in the house because of his joblessness, and rank stupidity of his remarks on the various situations. Aimless and looser though he may be, he means no harm. Tries to help the family in his own way, just that his cerebral faculty just can not come up something which makes sense.

Ranveer Shourie cake walks the role. His fluent Punjabi accent, his eternal perplexed expressions are the special features of his acting in this movie. He is the character next door, indeed.

Again, in one of the better scenes of the movie - when Khoslas find out that someone else has been squatting on their plot, then there is a confrontation between the Haryanvi guard, and Bunty. Its a laugh riot. Both Shourie and the guard made the scene memorable.

Bapu(Navin Nishchol), who runs an acting school, takes part in the con job of hoodwinking Khurana. His character is a reluctant one, and he does an admirable job there. But he really lifts himself when he masks himself as suave, filthy rich Sethi from Dubai who wants to get rid off one of his property.

When Sethi and Khurana meet in a 5 star hotel to discuss the deal, this, to me, is the best scene of the movie. In this scene Sethi and Khurana want to assess each other. The scene is very well conceptualized, as both the parties don't give an inch to each other. Both act recklessly cocky.

In the same scene the demure Bapu beats the daylights out of his assistant(another conman), when as a bold Sethi, without giving any expressions, he brazenly asks Khurana - "Aap Broker Hain Ya Party?" Khurana is visibly shaken, but puts a brave face and answers in negative. Hats off to director, scriptwriter and not to mention Irani and Nishchol!

Well, there are other amazing scenes like when Khurana goes to visit and revisit(even more amazing) the land site he is going to buy from Sethi, or when Khosla and his younger son Cherry(Pravin Dabas) have a confrontation over going US and later over Cherry's ridiculous name (his real name was Chiraunji Lal), or when exceptionally talented Vinay Pathak as Asif Iqbal, who was the mastermind of the whole plot to cheat Khuarana himself, breaks into "Jai Mata Di" after plan's success, surprising Cherry, since the former was a Muslim.

There are so many of them.

The other character which I found soothing was of Sardar Sahini played by the person who was the only link between this film and Mai Meri Patni And Woh - Vinod Nagpal. Sahini was the good old friend of Khosla, with whom latter shared his problems. He was very likable in the film.

All this while, it would appear whole plot is about to get revealed by some unwanted, unexpected situation, but it didn't. Jaipdeep Sahini had added enough ups and down, and they were all very well written.

What I didn't like was Tara Sharma, and the tele-serial like production quality of the movie. There were a few minor flaws in the script, for eg, just too many people knew about the whole plot to cheat Khurana, and this was the not good for plot's success.

But these can well be ignored. One must watch this one at leisure with family.

Don('t)

I had vowed that I won't be drawing any comparisons between the old and new DON at any stage, simply because though imitation is best form of flattery, comparison would kill this imitation altogether, as the original masterpiece is way beyond the realms of comparison.

But then, I am not good at vowing. When I could take it no longer, I am forced to write my crib in public.

Though unlike Farhan's, my dad hasn't written it, but like him, the movie is very close to my heart. Cult Amitabh movie. Cult 70s classic. Cult 70 music. Had almost no blemish, except one - Pran rope(walking) trick with his kids - but only just. When I dwell further, I think Amitabh turned this good movie into a evergreen classic.

Then why the crib? - Plenty, eh.

Music is out, and it is such a junk I simply feel liking throwing the CD out of the window.

See, I am not the guy who regularly buys CDs. Its usually a very expensive merchandise vis-a-vis the value it offers. I often settle for an audio cassette. But then, I am not the guy who regularly buys the cassette either, unless, I am absolutely convinced about the quality of the product.

This time I jumped the gun, twice over. I bought the CD in the hope that since two songs are from the old one, and the title song is sounding good, as well, I assumed it to be a good bet. But as they say in management, to assume is akin to making ASS of (yo)U and ME, that's exactly what has happened.

But question is not just of money. I am hurt at this playful sacrilege.

I agree Shankar-Ehasaan-Loy(S-E-L) have been patently going nuts these days( KANK ^%*&^* grrr), but Farhan, where were you? Or have they done the whole thing while you were sleeping!

Javed Bhai To definitely So Re Le Hain!

I haven't heard a more mediocre Ganpati song in Hindi films before! Such an ordinary lyrics(and awful singing to back it up). What has happened to you? As with Big B these days, has mediocricity engulfed you as well? Hope it is not the fall from grace.

And was this Ganpati situation added as a cheap marketing gimmick encashing Ganpati Festival? If that was so, then the Lord is not with you too because at first the song is terrible, and then T-Series delayed the release!

Coming back to music. Yeh Mera Dil version is sung by Sunidhi Chauhan. The song looks like another stale DJ Aqeel remix. Sunidhi's voice is not even audible over the music! S-E-L fellows, you guys should have done some out of box thinking and made still-crooning Asha Bhosle do the second version again. Would have been much better!

Now would you say then why not bring Helen back? You bet, and I wish!

Kareena is a horrendous blunder, Farhan Bhai. She is as stiff as her midriff in the song. Expressions have not come out the way they should, and body language has grammatical errors. Agree, choreography is ordinary too. But her elder sister would have done a much better job with one leg, and worse choreography.

Khaike Paan has been meddled with, and needlessly. I am sore(but who cares). The prelude lyrics - "Bhang Ka Rang Jama Ho Chaka Chuck" have been chucked away with, and replaced with some new hiphop. Sorry, not worked.

To add to the misery further, Shahrukh too lends his voice in middle. Of course, he can't be singing because otherwise what was Udit Narayan doing! Clearly, Shahrukh was added to provide some colour to Udita Narayan's bland rendering.

I am sure, the original song lyricist - Lalji Pandey, urf, Anjaan (father of lyricist Sameer and a Banarasi himself ), Kishore Kumar and Kalyanji must have collectively shook with discomfort in their respective graves.

Then we have Don - The Theme, Don - Revisited, Main Hoon Don (Fncinternational Mix- whatever that means), adorning the album. Why all this, pray? They don't do much to assuage my hurt feelings, rather they irritate further.

All is not lost, however. As I said, title track - Mai Hoon Don is good. Shan does a good rendering. Lyrics again are a trifle shabby work, but overall the songs makes a nice listening. Then there is a new addition - "Aaj Ki Raat" which paces out well. Looks like some Jugalbandi going on between the lead and side heroine, intercepted in middle, for truce, by our DON.

Truly, Farhan is a chip off the old block, and I have no meek notions concerning the intrinsic value of said old block, the ordinary lyrics of this and KANK not withstanding. But I sincerely hope you have done a much better job in the movie.

See the storyline is predictable, and then there is a wooden Arjun Rampal impersonating the irrepressible Pran to negotiate. I am no Shahrukh fan either. Please don't make the going further tough for us.

I have heard there is a surprise element in the beginning and in the end of the film, but give us a bigger surprise. DON can't be made without Amitabh. Give him a meat in the movie, and surprise the audience. Common, I am sure you have done this. It must be a well disguised a secret.

Then, the new Don will be complete. If I were you, I would have done this.

Babu Moshai

How ironical is the fact that legendry Hrishikesh Mukherjee died the same day another legend Mukesh Chandra Mathur left us three decades back! Ironical because the songs picturised on ill fated Rajesh Khanna in Anand, directed by Hrishi Da, were sung by Mukesh.

Hrishi Da, you did some fantastic stuff for us middle-class-small-towners. We believed in your characterizations. We identified in your natural settings. In your movies rush was less on roads and more in houses. Had less of Mumbai, and more of rest of India. Comedy wasn't loud, slapstick. Pathos was subtle rather than dramatic.

Stars played characters instead themselves. I loved your Mili. I loved the brooding Amitabh of Mili. I loved the way you left Mili open ended. I loved the naughty Jaya in Guddi. There are so many such Gudda,Guddis in schools. I loved that prayer from Guddi.

I cried at the end of Abhiman. I still cry when I see it. I can feel for Amitabh. My heart churns for Jaya. Oh, it is so real! Anand is so refreshing. Rajesh Khanna is lovable. Someone else would have made it gloomy. Again, ending was unthinkable.

Namak Haram gave us a star. Not Rajesh Khanna. He was the waning one. Its Amitabh. He stole the thunder from Rajesh.

Who can forget Parimal Tripathi aka Pyarey Mohan, Sukumar Sinha, Sulekha Chaturvedi, Vasudha and how they together pulled a fast one their "Jijja Ji" - Raghavendra Sharma! Or those lectures in Botany by the Professor of English. And the link between Corolla and Karela ? Not those who have seen it.

Golmaal has even bettered Chupke Chupke. Ek Jhooth Chhupane Ke Liye Sau Jhooth Bolne PAdtey Hain. Sheer magical screenplay and performances of boys and girls next door. A perfect dose against foul mood and related ailments.

Buddha Mil Gaya presented a murder mystery. It also had Aayo Kahan Se Ghanshyam, Bhali Bhali Si Ek Surat, and Raat Kali. Bawarchi was another household saga so commonly found but so simplistically handled.

Khoobsurat, Jhoothi explored the new dimension of Rekha and again so middle class, so identifiable. Sadma brought tears, and Bemisaal was indeed bemisaal.

Your tele venture Talash, where Alok Nath disappears, was excellent too.

But I loved your unheard, unseen Jurmana the most. One of your few movies I saw just once. That's because they never telecasted again. What a story of sin, guilt and repentance! Amitabh with negative shades, and here I must add - you had handled Amitabh the best; better than Chopras, Sippys, Mehras and Desais.

You gave us your fabulous under study in Gulzar. You yourself were the offshoot of brilliant Bimal Roy. Talented artists like Utpal Dutt, Omprakash, David, Asrani found new feet under your guidance.

We will miss you. Like the last line in Anand, "Anand Marte Nahin", people like you would never die from our memories.

Timbaktoo

The interesting thing I noticed in the movie Omkara was mentioning of Timbaktoo.

Naseeruddin Shah - Bhai Ji - tells about his honeymoon travails. According to him, he went to Timbaktoo for his honeymoon. Timbaktoo is a city in the west African country - Mali, a part of Sahara desert.

But this city is also the part of some mythical legends, and many people still think it is not a real city. Something like our Jhumri Tallaiyya.

But this is not the interesting part. The interesting part is that Timbaktoo is also the name of the movie which Vishal Bharadwaj had planned, but later shelved it.

It was shelved because Pankaj Kapoor, the lead actor, had pointed out certain inherent contradictions in the script, and suggested changes to Vishal. But the script writer Abbas Tyrewala refused to budge. What an ego!Hence the project was shelved.

But Vishal Bharadwaj did mention of this place in the movie.

Othello, With A Twist

First, I would like to sound an alarm. The movie is full of profanities, and innuendoes. So take care.

The movie it self is nothing path breaking. Just ok. The brilliance of music doesn't get repeated in the movie. Brilliance of Maqbool doesn't get repeated either.

Personally, I don't see the necessity of foul language at all. If one wanted to be realistic, then we all know profanities used in the movie is way elementary as compared what actually used. So why not make profanity more lavish to be actually realistic.

Also, it would have been much better if Vishal had shot more on real locations. Citing logistic difficulty doesn't hold much water when Bunty and Bubbly, Seher, Mai Meri Patni Aur Woh, Haasil, Umrao Jaan (recent) can be shot there.

As far as scripting is concerned, I think weakness of Othello, the play, passed on to Omkara, the movie. The dimensions that Macbeth provided, and the brilliant finer adaptations that resulted in Maqbool were missing.

The much hyped politico-mafia equation was truly half baked. Its never so simple. There is always a love-hate relationship which keeps changing with opportunities and time. Look at Seher or Haasil, and you will understand what I mean. But Bhaiji-Omkara equation looked like a Saat-Janam-Bandhan!

Also there were some ridiculous situation like coronation of Bahu Bali, train sequence etc. This was all crap when one is so big advocate of realism.

Here, I must add that I have nothing against the characters in the movie. They looked real and carefully developed, except Billo Chaman Bahar. Era of Nautankis is well and truly over in rural Uttar Pradesh. There may be perhaps one or two orchestra, here and there, but definitely, none would sing a Kajri or Thumri today. Filmy numbers, perhaps, yes.

One good thing was that Omkara wasn't a complete ass like Othello. At least, he did have a mind of his own.

To talk about the performance, Konkona is truly exceptional. The dialect, the performance, everything was perfect. Ajay Devgan is good. He had the poise of a leader, and carried on till end. Saif did a fine job, but never looked menacing or wicked. Vivek Oberoi was the boy next door even in this movie. Who else...? Oh yes, Kareena. She was OK too.

Those who have traveled long distance would remember that even if the trains are late at our starting station, they usually catch up during the night and we reach our destinations on time. But they never skip any station to do the same. Every stop is honoured.

In the multiplex I was watching this movie, our particular show got delayed by half an hour. To catch up with the time, they messed up all the songs. Title song was shown only till Mukhda. For Lakkad not even complete Mukhda was shown. Namak was started mid way. They completely ruined the whole mood!

I don't have any suggestions to make. Those who want to watch the movie may go ahead and see. Those who haven't made up their mind may skip. I would prefer a Maqbool any day.

Omkara(Addendum)

Now that some of the snippets containing a bit of dialogues are being shown - the dialect looks like that of Chambal(MP)-Gwalior(MP)-Etawah(UP) region which is the part of Bundel Khand.

Though the rural stretch of that region was and even probably is under the influence of some gangster activity, but such a dialect would be a bit harsh on audience ears. In fact, even I, being used to Khadi Boli, and Awadhi dialect find it difficult to comprehend some times.

This may dent the commercial viability of this project.

Fanaa

What a yaaawwwn, yaar! Fought hard not to catch a wink, surprisingly so, for I am not a guy who cares for a siesta!

There is literally no pace, excitement in the movie, and is full of factual and logical defects.

If there were only one or two faults, it could have been passable. But virtually the whole movie is littered with them - God knows who wrote the story, who directed it, and who was the editor.

Kajol's character is so desperate that she falls for a cheap Shayari speaking, road side Lafanga(seemingly) in the very first meeting. Not only she, even her giggling friends, her teacher - every one.

She is so desperate to the core that she decides to sleep with him even when he himself told her that he is a self proclaimed Lafanga! And then she says she doesn't have anymore expectations.

On hindsight, I could guage why was she so desperate. It was in her genes. Her mother was even more desperate. Amazed to find a broad minded Muslim family in the secludes of Udhampur asking her daughter to find a match for herself in Delhi.

Then some eye-blinding ailment which could not be treated five years back, can be treated now. Medical since never made such fast progress in my life!

Then the poor girl was made to travel to another hospital(or same ) immediately after her eye operation and dressing removal. A real doc would have told her to stay put or else patient won't be able to tolerate so much light so early after the surgery. Even a cataract operation patient wears a green clothed spectacles for a good two weeks.

And where is she taken? To the morgue! And what is she made to identify - a dead body? Nope -a hand made pull over by her. What the heck? If only that was to be shown, why couldn't they bring those stuff to her hospital bed.

And please, no body wears a Taaweez or a locket in an Operation Theatre. Every single piece of jewelry is taken out.

Again after the terrorist hullabaloo, and Amir's tearing off Kajol's photograph to pieces at a swanky airport, for the effect, as everybody guesses - they meet again.

Surprise, Kajol is not able to recognize his voice, though she does get "Jaane Pehchane Si" feeling after touching him. Another surprise Kajol feels attracted once again. Despo!!!

Then there is a Toofan outside in which, though, one can sing and dance but can not go out or Indian army can not launch a combing/search exercise. They can't even show terrorist's photograph early enough on television, and even when they showed, they didn't show the name.

They(army) are even more dumber than this. An imposter replaces another kidnapped captain and nobody is able to catch that.

Even though radio signals were sent by Aamir from a particular house, they could not ascertain the location of the house, but when Kajol sent them, they were able to get the location.

And now comes the dialogues. The most horrible part of the movie. Remember those seventies movies when a few dialogues use to become the theme dialogues of the movie, and used to get repeated many a times.

This movie took big on this idea and particularly the two dialogues got on my nerves - "Ab Tumhey Darr Laga Hoga", and "Ehsaan Aapko Jitna Pyar Kerta Hai, Aap Ehsaan Ko Itna Pyar Nahin Kertin".

Let me try to find any good points of the movie. Ok, Kajol was good. She looked good like any Yash Chopra heroine(excessive cleavage show were unnecessary), and acted effortlessly. Aamir was ok in first, and good in second half. No other character is worth talking about.

Music is good especially the opening and the title song. Rest were Ok. Cinematography was good too. But as you see all these things are support cast, and they alone can't make the movie watchable. Script - that is story, screenplay, and dialogues have to be good - which unfortunately were not.

Yash Chopra might have made money - but the days of Lamhe, Chandini and DDLJ seem to be well and truly over.

Mai, Meri Patni Aur Woh

Well, the inadequate promos were adequate enough for me to take the decision of watching this movie. And the verdict is that despite a bit-let-down second half, or rather I should say the last half an hour, the movie is definitely a must watch.

What makes it work? To begin with, the Hrishikesh Mukherjee touch given by director Chandan Arora work wonders for the movie. The narrative is smooth and unhindered. The story is very simple, and incidents are very much realistic. Like any Hrishi Da's movie, all the characters look next door, and most of the events look like happening around you.

Next are the almost natural acting put up by the brilliant cast, and the authentic locations. Rajpal Yadav unleashes his full talent before us. His action and reactions to the situation he finds himself in are perfect. He is the protagonist, and manages the hold movie well. He was the perfect Mithlesh Shukla, and Mithlesh Shukla was him.

The national award winner Rituparna Sengupta convinces why she is the queen of Bengali film industry. She perfectly complimented to Rajpal Yadav, and did full justice to the character of Veena. And yes, she is beautiful too.

Supporting cast is very important in such films, where the protagonist is not larger than life, so every miniscule character sort of takes the movie forward. The Vinod Nagpal plays adorable Mamaji. Saw him after a long time. Chubby Varun Badola does full justice to his character. Kay Kay is as reliable as ever. Even that three shot Tempo wala looked so very convincing.

Locations are perfect. Lucknow is rocking these days. After brief appearances in Bunty Aur Bubbly, and Sehar - this movie painted the whole city red. Almost entirely shot in Lucknow, I could recognize every nook and corner. Dialogues were perfect, keeping in line with local lingo, even the cast had the strong Uttar Pradesh leanings. You can call me prejudiced :-)

The two let downs, however, were the slow, Lucknawi style, pace which becomes too blatant in the second half, and the lack of that final twist. In second half, the story became too predictable, and it needed a typical Hrishkesh Mukherjee style high voltage climax. That never came. Director had ample time to do that, but the script writer floundered.

But never mind that. Movie has much more pluses, than minuses. Such movies should be enjoyed and encouraged. So please go to nearest theatre and watch this one. You would love it.

In Defence Of Sehar

A comment by one of the three boisterous gentlemen, seated bang behind me, perhaps underscored what was expected of the movie. "Serious Role Iska( Arshad Warsi) USP Nahin Hai. Comedy Mein Hi Janchta Hai."

The problem was that these guys just took out the newspaper, saw Warsi's name against Sehar and yelled 'Vow! Another Comedy', and in they went to the theater. And when it turned out to be a seriously serious movie, they wrongly declared the lead actor as the chief conspirator. Sorry boss! This is not done.

Arshad Warsi is first rate in the movie. So is Pankaj Kapoor( will come to him later).The problem, though, was in the screenplay. The director had such a strong story, but he spoilt it with too many characters, and some badly conceived scenes. Perhaps the director Kabeer Kaushik's inexperience showed here. In the zeal to make a 'realistic' movie, he forgot to add the entertainment value.

To begin with, the romantic angle was very badly handled. The conversations between the young SSP and the Lucknow University Economics teacher were very highly unrealistic, even by the conservative Lucknow standards. They were a shade too tentative, and shy. I guess he was better off showing a married SSP(though it is now much cliched in a cop movie), and cut down the romance angle a bit. Needless to say, Mahima Chowdhari was a complete misfit.

The other complain is the lack of humour. I refuse to believe that anybody, even a SSP for that matter, does not have a sense of humour, or when cops chat together, they don't share a joke or two. Comic relief was much needed to ease the tension, even if it was a reality cinema. Cue from Maqbool, Haasil or Sarfarosh should have been taken.

Now the good points. The ultimate mix of cast and the script. Warsi is a revelation. He has not been shown as a ruthless or vindictive cop. He is in fact a thinking cop in the movie, who dwells on the investigation seriously. He plan strategies before an encounter or raid. He is quick to find a loop hole, and provide a solution. There is no style in his gait. There are no unnecessary confrontations with the superior either.

To conceive this by the director is one thing. To pull it off is another. Warsi, as I said earlier, was mindblowing.

Unfortunately, there is nothing above than the first rate or I would have rated Pankaj Kapoor the same. Maqbool, Dus, and now Sehar - Pankaj Kapoor has done it yet again. Every frame which involves him, is full of life. Though the heights of Neem Ka Ped cannot be breached, he easily surpasses Maqbool. He lits a small Diya of humour which had been lacking till then.

He reserved his best for the chilling climax when Warsi asks him the reason why he has left the injured constable alone. Warsi doesn't know that constable is dead. Kapoor doesn't utter a word, and conveys that just with facial expressions. Sorry folks, I just cannot explain the scene. It has to be seen to be believed. Full credit to the director as well. He specifically wrote that character with only Pankaj Kapoor in mind, and the genius did what genius do.

Sushant Singh was good. He did look ruthless, though I must mention that the original person was not as ruthless. Also, with the kind of bigwig killing shown in the movie - it appears that Lucknow was completely littered with blood. That is not true. Lucknow was not so much in the don's radar. There were not even half as many killings. But perhaps to convince the audience, the writer over did it.

On personal front, I got the eyeful of Lucknow, both from the sky and land. It looked so beautiful. Then there were those familiar lanes, buildings and their names echoed through out the movie. Loved all of it.

Had the writer-director added some more humour element, it wouldn't have been the heavy diet it turned out to be and would have been much more watchable even with Mahima around. Though, UPites can still give it a go. They would easily relate to it.

The Rising

May be I am missing something. The album is out, and people (mostly at blogs) are loving it. To me, apart from Mangal Mangal, rest of it appears to be a pedestrian stuff. Not a great Rehmaan fan anyway. Swadesh was even worse.

Seeing the promos, the movie seems to be more filmi, than realistic. Not sure if it is just promo editing that is bad. Needless to say, I am disappointed. I sincerely hope that the movie rises above its mediocre album and the promos.

Chanda Mama Door Ke...

Not sure whether many of us remember this song. My mother used to sing it for me, and later for my little sis. Those days(some 12-15 years back), it was quite a regular in Vividh Bharti.

Basically, this song is from the movie Vachan(1955). It was music director Ravi Sharma's first movie. Lyrics were written by Ravi himself, and it was hummed by Asha Bhonsle.

Incidentally, Ravi is one composer who has given us the immortal tunes for almost every occasion. For our birthdays he has gifted ‘Hum Bhi Agar Bache Hote’. The ultimate Shaadi song on which every one of us must have danced - ‘Aaj Mere Yaar Ki Shaadi Hai', has also been immortalized by Ravi. The Vidai Geet on which every married lady must have cried buckets, and would-be-marrying ones will do the same -'Babul Ki Duaen Leti Ja’ is another claim to Ravi's fame.

Coming back to this classic, 'Chanda Mama Door Ke' is one for the lullaby section. It's an ultimate kiddo song. Apparently, the kid aka 'Munna' is not so happy with his situation. To placate him, mother is promising 'moon' to him. Not sure about the 'Munna', but my sister soon called our bluff. She would wisely insist on something earthly.

Here are the lyrics for your children, and for those 'Non Applicables' yet, it will bring the fond memories back.

Lolita Rocks!

At the time where I should have made a bee line for Sarkar or Paheli, I decided - first things first. Went on to watch Parineeta last weekend, and it reconfirmed that its always better late than never.

This late-lateefy, though, was due to a bit of apprehension towards the movie on my part. When I saw those repeat promos of the song - Piyu Bole, Piya Boley, I was quite put off by the extravagant eye movements of the leading lady - Divya Balan. But with a nice company of friends & family, I set aside my hesitation. And, boy, I never regretted the decision.

The very object of my concern - Lolita, the protagonist, swept me off my feet, by her sheer screen presence and the ease before the camera. With a voice of Saira Bano, and the looks like that of the proverbial girl-next-door, she took the complex character of Lolita well in her stride.

The character was that of a super woman. Lolita was a woman who would top at college, was working in an office, even in 1962. She could write the lyrics, impromptu; She was also a good singer, and even gave suggestions on music. She would make delicious food, excellent cake, and was a good hand at cards. In between, she always had the time for finding clothes or knitting buttons for her next door childhood friend.

All this when she was an orphan since childhood, and lived with her maternal uncle!

The problem with such characters is that the portraying artist either over does it or falls way below the par performance required. We could never see the real Ashoka behind Shahrukh, could we ? Divya, rather, could strike that fine balance with comfort. Her expressions were perfect in every situation, and yes that life-like face has a lot to do with it. She will go a long way.

As far as movie is concerned, its good. The story has fine twists & turns, though its way too simplistic. Direction is taut. There is hardly a loose end, or dull moment. Photography is scenic. Though I do have some issues with the art director, because opulence is way too artificial.

To depict the Kolkotta of 1962, there were some subtle hints, and some in your face stuff. Like there was considerably less traffic on the streets which was a subtle hint, but repeated advertisement of painkiller Saridon was a bit too much.

As far as casting is concerned, the team should get a pat. No extra character, and each & every one has the perfect selection of the artist. Saif sizzles, Sanjay assures. All the side kicks(also performed very well) are from Bengal film & theatre industry. This gave a realistic touch to the whole narration. Even the bridegroom selected for just one scene was Bengali. It was easy to make out - the large forehead, and big eyes - typical Bengali.

What to say about the music, which complimented the movie so well. Songs are picturised well too. Look out for the song - 'Yeh Hawain, Gungunai' picturised on Saif and some kids on a train. The kid in the middle is really chubby with some tremendous enthusiasm.

A must watch for those who missed it. If only for Lolita!